Art, Censorship, & Birthday Shots of Tequila with Nanna – Part 2 – In Which Nanna Might Have Robbed a Crack House

February 13, 2011

(continued from “Art, Censorship, and Birthday Shots of Tequila with Nanna” )

Later, I tried to open my eyes. I had a searing, splitting headache and I could only open one eye. My other eye felt puffy and swollen. I saw some guy – a young hoodlum type individual sitting against the wall. A knife sticking out of the front of his shoulder. He looked absurdly pale, I saw the fear in his eyes.

It was like watching TV with one eye and no sound. I followed his gaze to see where he was looking and I saw what he saw.

My Nanna had one of his associates in a headlock with her pistol hand and was punching him in the face repeatedly with her left. Another young man was lying on the floor rubbing his forehead.

Dear Lord! My Nanna was robbing a crack house, again.

The room start to spin and all went dark.

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I woke up in my back yard. The birds were chirping and the dogs were sitting next to me. I thought about how much the garage needs to be painted.

Nanna came out with a tray of iced tea and “Heyday” bars. She had her baking apron on and seemed barely able to hold the tray steady as the dogs went over to greet her.

“Down now you sillies” she said as she held the tray higher before setting it next to the chaise lounge and me while scolding the dogs to go away.

“Thanks Nanna” I said as I watched a squirrel taunt both of the dogs from the garage roof.

Nanna sat in the chair next to me and pulled a longneck from her apron.

“Open this for me Honey.” she said

I opened her beer for her and reached for an iced tea. “I had one hell of a dream, Nanna.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I dreamt we were in a crack house and you were . . .”

I reached for a Heyday bar before finishing my sentence and it disappeared.

“Where’d the Heyday bar go Nanna?”

“They haven’t made those things in 30 years.”

“Huh?”

“This is your dream, Honey – we’re still in that crack house – you really need to not watch so much Monty Python, Dearie.”